Me and Chad are still together and very happy. He's so excited about the baby, and really proud of me. He knows how hard some days still are.
It's been a year since I last purged! I never thought this day would come. I still get really bad acid reflux that like tears my stomach apart and i think it's because of how much I used to purge. Maybe. I never had the problem until I did and it got bad.
I have been eating normally! Like really normally, not binging, fasting, or skipping any meals. Ever since I've been pregnant. Even when I have those days where I cry in the mirror cause my body is getting so big and changing and even though I watch the numbers creep up and get closer to my HW. I'm like 173 now and I was in the 140s a while back. 165 when I got pregnant. I still make sure I eat good and take my vitamins cause I can't hurt the one thing in the world I love so much and hurt them and Chad by going back to who I used to be.
I'm almost 5 months and I can't wait to not be pregnant anymore. I don't know what I'm gonna do after I have the baby. I don;t want to go back to my ED but I kind of do and I know that's a bad thought but I just see myself slipping once I'm done with pregnancy.
We'll see.
I miss you all, sucks so many I used to follow don't post, but I noticed some of you still do which is great :)
<3 Toxic
